Ellen Goes Holiday Shopping at Target


– LET’S TALK ABOUT THE HOLIDAYS. HOW MANY OF YOU
HAVE STARTED YOUR SHOPPING? ANYBODY? YEAH?
[cheers and applause] IT’S STRESSFUL, ISN’T IT? IT’S VERY STRESSFUL. I THOUGHT OF A BRILLIANT WAY
TO GET MY SHOPPING DONE. I WENT TO TARGET, BECAUSE THEY HAVE EVERYTHING
THAT I NEEDED, AND– HERE’S HOW I’M DOING
MY SHOPPING FROM NOW ON. [singing]
– SHE CAME TO GIVE IT TO YOU – GIRL, IT AIN’T WHAT YOU DO [feedback squeals] – ATTENTION. ATTENTION. TARGET SHOPPERS,
THIS IS TALK SHOW HOST AND ALL-AROUND ENTERTAINER
ELLEN DEGENERES. I HAVE A FEW ANNOUNCEMENTS
TO MAKE, SO PLEASE LISTEN CAREFULLY. FIRST, IF YOUR LICENSE PLATE
IS 7LW493, I HAVE YOUR SIDE MIRROR. I AM SO SORRY. [laughter]
I APOLOGIZE. ALSO, I NEED SOME SHOPPING. I DON’T WANT TO DO IT MYSELF. WHOEVER BRINGS ME
THE FOLLOWING ITEMS FIRST IS GONNA GET
A WONDERFUL PRIZE, ALL RIGHT? GO TO THE TOY SECTION
AND FIND THE GIANT ELSA “FROZEN”
MY SIZE DOLL. [upbeat holiday music] – [singing]
YOU’RE HERE WHERE YOU SHOULD BE SNOW IS FALLING – BRING ME THAT
AND YOU GET A PRIZE. – [singing]
IT JUST WASN’T THE SAME ALONE ON CHRISTMAS DAY – [singing]
LET IT GO LET IT GO [mumbling tune] YOU GOT IT. YOU WIN. $500.
YOU DID IT! YES.
– THANK YOU! – THE NEXT THING I NEED
IS A CHRIS MARCH SANTA BEARD. THE FIRST THREE PEOPLE.
I NEED THREE OF THEM. – [singing]
CHRISTMAS WAS COLD AND GREY – [grunts] – YOU MUST BE WEARING IT WHEN YOU ARRIVE. – [singing]
ALONE TO CELEBRATE – WHY DOES SANTA
HAVE THREE GARDENS, EVERYBODY? ‘CAUSE HE LIKES TO
“HOE, HOE, HOE.” THIS THING ON? YOU HAVE WON. HERE’S WHAT I NEED NOW: TAYLOR SWIFT’S FRAGRANCE,
TAYLOR BY TAYLOR. IT’S A GIFT FOR MY TAILOR. MY TAILOR WANTS
TAYLOR BY TAYLOR. IF YOU HAVE A TAILOR
NAMED TAYLOR, YOUR TAILOR WOULD BE GETTING A– LOOK AT YOU ALREADY WITH THAT. $100 GIFT CARD.
– AWESOME, THANK YOU. – THANK YOU SO MUCH.
AND TAKE MY HOLIDAY CD. THIS IS THE BIGGEST PRIZE YET. IT’S FOR $1,000–
TARGET GIFT CARD. GO GET A BOTTLE OF BOOZE
OF SOME KIND. GO GET A BEARD.
PUT THE BEARD ON. GO TO THE HOME SECTION
AND GET THE THRESHOLD BAR CART, AND ROLL IT HERE. – [singing]
ALONE ON CHRISTMAS DAY PRESENTS,
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL SIGHT DON’T MEAN A THING
IF YOU AIN’T HOLDING ME TIGHT – WONDERFUL. WHOO! THAT IS $1,000. KEV, HERE’S THE CUERVO
YOU ASKED FOR. – OH, THANKS.
– ALL RIGHT. OKAY, I NEED SOMEONE HERE
AT CHECKOUT FIVE, ‘CAUSE I NEED TO GET OUT
OF HERE. [cheers and applause] AND A HAPPY HOLIDAY
TO YOU ALL. [cheers and applause] THAT WAS FUN. MORE OF THAT. MORE OF THAT.
I LIKE IT. ALL RIGHT. I WANT TO MAKE
YOUR SHOPPING EASIER, SO YOU’RE ALL GONNA GO HOME
WITH A $150 TARGET GIFT CARD. [cheers and applause] YAY!

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