Summer Anime 2019 in a Nutshell


Out of all the dedicated fanbases out there that had hassled me to watch their show every season I’ve got to give it to the Symphogear fanbase for their perseverance. Every month it’s: “Gigguk, have you watched Symphogear yet?” “Gigguk, watch Symphogear!” And here I am looking at the summercharts thinking: “How the hell does this have FIVE seasons?” So you know what Symphogear fans? I hear you. Maybe this time I’ll actually give every attention you desiirr- Oh ho my God! [Hyped Gigguk noises] DO YOU GUYS SEE THIS?! THIS IS INCREDIBLE! THERE’S AN ISEKAI WITH A MOM THIS SEASON!!! [Brand-new Seasonal Anime in a Nutshell intro] “What are you doing?” “Wathing p0rn” “Oh thank God I thought you were watching Anime” Be honest, If you hear of an Anime being about five Highschool girls curious and intereseted in sex Your first thought is: “Aaaahhhh shiieeeet,” “here we go again Anime!” “The return of…” But actually, this is a teen sex comedy-drama from Mari Okida of Anohana and Nagi no Asukara. It deals with a group of girls reaching that age where puberty is hitting like a… …and them losing their childhood innocence as you first discover and get curious about sex, losing your virginity, blowjobs, handjobs, and who knows, maybe even a bit of pre-marital hand-holding. It’s awkward, it’s relatable, and honestly, it’s laugh-out-loud funny. This is one of the most under-watched Anime this season so I don’t know how to sum it up easily to get more people to watch i- Oh my God, this is just moe American Pie. Ah yes, a woman of culture. [Laughs mockingly] Look at this try-hard pansy… Alright, time to see what actual P E A K P E R F O R M A N C E looks like. I’m actually convinced there is nothing more powerful in this world than cute Anime girls. (Well, who says that they aren’t?!) K-On! got people to pick up an instrument, A Place Further Than the Universe
made you want to travel, Yuru Camp got you sleeping in the outdoors, and now, after years of avoiding the gym, I suddenly want to get my unfit ass to shape ’cause I saw some cute Anime girls working out! ʷᵃˢ ᶦᵗ ʳᵉᵃˡˡʸ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵉᵃˢʸˀ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ, ᶦᵗ ʷᵃˢ ʳᵉᵃˡˡʸ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵉᵃˢʸᵎ Can we just replace the entire School Curriculum with cute Anime girls doing stuff at this point? ’cause I don’t know how this be so motivational, entertaining, and teach me important fitness lessons too like, Lesson no. 1: “Never skip Face Day” Bear Grylls: “I’m Bear Grylls and today we’re gonna look at some of the top survival movies,” Bear Grylls: “and figure out just how realistic they are.” Bear Grylls: “This brings back good memories…” Bear Grylls: “but the thing is it totally works.” Bear Grylls: “I mean I’ve done that in the Sahara with a…” Bear Grylls: “with a camel.” (for those who want the original video:
“Bear Grylls Reviews Survival Movies | Vanity Fair”) Now we’ve gone from cute girls doing S W O L E things to cute girls doing each other, on an island. I mean cute girls do desert island survival. And each other. Look, think what you will, but this is a SERIOUS educational survival show and, I mean, if you can’t learn things from watching one, or two, or four Anime girls letting out in a permanent beach episode, then really, what’s the point? Speaking of survival Anime, we’ve got another one in *Title on lower-left corner* which, I’m told, has a very similar plot to the Netflix series… and, also the 1998 feature film… Oh, and not forgetting the 1965 series… I think it’s about people who get transported into a fantasy world or something… All right, now we’re fucking talking *Title on lower-left corner* was one of the most hyped new Shonen Jump manga and I can totally see why. It’s set 3,700 years in the future after the entire world was turned to stone which we know because the main character, Senku, kept track of it by taking the MrBeast channel to the next level (Maybe Morgz should try this too…) Humanity has regressed to the stone age and through the knowledge of science they find a way to survive and aim to bring modern civilization back and the first step to surviving in the Stone World is Bear Grylls: “To drink my own pee” I really like this one, you know forgetting that this is just basically Shonen Primitive Technology, It’s a very interesting concept that I haven’t seen in Anime. It revolves around gaining technology way more advanced than the current environment should allow for. Yes, the power system is just basically just basic science! (no need to caption this one right?) The only thing that bewildered me is how it really carefully set up its rules as a realistic world of science. “Here’s a world where knowledge can overcome the trials of nature.” “You too can do exactly the same at home if you follow our steps” “That’s how much thought we put into it.” Oh and by the way here’s a JoJo character. [A Z T E C D U B S T E P Intensifies] (wAs tHaT A mOthErFuCKiNg JoJo rEfEREncE?!!) (iS evERyThinG a JoJo RefEreNCe?) (aRe OuR LiVeS jUst An eLegANt aMaLgaMAtiOn oF JoJo RefErEnCEs?!!!) (again, no need to caption this right?) [The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Theme Song] ♫ Now ♫ ♫ this is ♫ ♫ a story ♫ ♫ all about ♫ ♫ how ♫ ♫ my life got ♫ էɾąղʂքօɾէҽժ ìղէօ ąղօէհҽɾ աօɾӀժ You know, I would call this a running joke if it was actually FUNNY, Yes, Isekai hasn’t died yet and yes, we’ve somehow we got more Isekai this season than ever before. At this point you already know if you’re Isekai trash and are immune to the repetition or if you just phase it out and move on. So, my fellow Isekai Trashmen, let’s get ready to jump back into the genre once again… This is honestly the ɆĐ₲łɆ₴₮ shit I’ve seen in a while and you know what? I know it’s bad, but this is the premium Isekai junkfood I fucking eat up. I heard that this is completely butchering the source material but honestly, no matter how poorly this may be adapting it I can’t see the edge going away in any form. Wait a minute… Completely butchered adaptation? Vampires? Powering up by eating monsters? A protagonist who literally turns his hair gray with the power of edge? This is just Tokyo Ghoul in another world! Oɪ, ᴡʜʏ ᴀʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴇʟᴇᴘᴏʀᴛɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟᴠᴇs ɪɴ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ɪs ᴀ ᴘʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴄᴀʟʟʏ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʀᴏᴀᴅ ʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ʀᴜɴ ᴏᴠᴇʀ? Remember what I said last season when Kenja no Mago had reached new heights of genericness? Well, ^
Title | here apparently led to that and went: “Psst, can I copy your homework?” “Yeah, sure.” “Just change it up so it doesn’t look obvious I copied right?” “Oh no, you can literally just copy it.” “Wait..” “wha-” As [an] Isekai trash, I’ve just come to accept that the true meaning of that is being able to watch the same show every season and still be entertained. Because, at this point, I count this as a rewatch. “Alright people, we’re starting to run out of ideas for Isekai and people are starting to notice” “Is there anywhere left for this genre to go?” “I’ve got it!” “MILFSekai!” “That’s the answer!” ᴹᴵᴸᶠˢᵉᵏᵃᶦ! ᴹᴵᴸᶠˢᵉᵏᵃᶦ MILFSekai! I dunno what it says about this genre when the most original Isekai this season is one where a mom gets transported into a game with her son. Though as MILF-tastic as this mom is, I can’t help but get turned off by here complete lack of parenting skills to raise this dipshit of a kid! Byish, u really gonna let your kid talk to you like that?! I mean for fuck sake! Give him some spanking! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Teach him some discipline! Just get him fucking VACCINATED already! ’cause their relationship is literally: In Cartman’s voice: “Oh, I’ve got a better idea!” In Cartman’s voice: “Why don’t you go across the street,” In Cartman’s voice: “and buy some condoms?” In Cartman’s voice: “Because we should at least be safe” In Cartman’s voice: “If you’re gonna” In Cartman’s voice: “FUCK me mom!” In Cartman’s voice: “You might as well buy some cigarettes too” In Cartman’s voice: “because I like to have smoke after get good and fucked!” In Cartman’s voice: “You wanna fuck me mom?” In Cartman’s voice: “Just say so!” Look if you’re watching this you already know the reason you’re watching this. Let’s not beat around the bush You’re looking for a bit of A R A – A R A ! in your life. And there ain’t anything wrong with that! We don’t judge here! As mah man Kakyoin likes to say: 🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰🅾🆁🅰 Awww Yeah! I’ts time to fight fire with fire! and guns Wait, whu- Honestly, I do feel a bit of *Title on lower-left corner* First, Promare steals its thunder, robbing it the label of “First Big Fire-fighter Anime” then of course, there’s this unfortunate coincidence that the subject matter tackles is uncomfortably similar to recent tragic event. Which, is a shame because if you’re able to remove all that and view it in its own bubble, it’s one of the best Anime this season. Coming from the creator of Soul Eater, This show looks fantastic. If you told me BONES had continued their work from Soul Eater to this, I would’ve totally believed you, but, this isn’t BONES, it’s David Production and it’s easily the best looking thing they’ve made. I’M SORRY OKAY?! OH GOD I’M SO SORRY!!!! OH GOD I’M SO SORRY!!!!
(You have provoked a gang war) But what surprised me even more is how much heart it has. I expected your typical Shonen with fantastic-looking action scenes, but I didn’t expect how touching a lot of these opening stories would be. It’s been a whole mixed bag of great surprises, and I’m looking forward to see where it’ll go. Coming right off the heels of a very disappointing third season of Index we’ve got Accelerator, continuing with the trend of Toaru’s spin-offs being superior to the mainline anime series and how could it not with best boi leading the series? It just breaks my heart that with all the Isekai airing this season, this is the only gig truck-kun has gotten. Wait, that’s illegal! And now THIS has a fantasy character who has been transported into OUR world so its like uh, reverse Isekai. Oh, and we’re back to Isekai. Wait a minute… this isn’t Isekai… What is this? a a fan [chocolate rain] sei?! Is that what they’re calling Isekai that’s Isekai nowadays? You know, I would be more excited for *Title on lower-left corner* but it’s been so long and so many fantasy dungeon-calling RPG-type Animes have come out since then that I barely remember anything that happened, but, can we just appreciate for a moment that this first arc essentially revolves around a war that got started because someone insuted a waifu? []laughs] It’s a literal Waifu War! “Oh man I love [idk, put in here if you know what he said]” Four bros playing in a rock band two feet apart because they’re totally GAY. Honestly, if this is actually pretty good. CG hands aside, the band performances looks and sounds great. The boys are all likeable, and it seems like a proper, Goddamn music Anime which is totally my jam! But, from this point on. can we just all agree to call it by its proper name, Remember this wimpy kid? Well, ever wonder what he’d look like if he was olde- OOO HO HO HO OOWWW! HELLLOOOOOO HELLLOOOOOO DADDY! Welp, looks like we’ve got another FATE/ spinoff to add to the meager list of FATE/ stuffs out there? Honestly though you can even this even if you’re not a FATE/ fan. It’s just CSI: London with magic where the gang solves different murder case every week. And hey! There’s no Holy Grail War so we don’t have another Saber clones added to the ridiculous large pile- Peter Griffin:”Aw crap.” Peter Griffin:”Well one of us is gonna have to change.” There are a handful of manga that are out there in legendary status that have never been adapted and, until this season, ^
Title | here was one of them. This stands as one of the most critically-acclaimed Seinen manga of all time, and I’m happy to say that Studio Wit seem to be giving it an amazing treatment it deserves. Of course, everyone’s going to point of the big fight scenes but equal care and attention has been given to the beautiful, quieter scenes, and, if you listen really carefully they added a really nice touch. *Yes there is sound in this part, just listen very closely* You can just about hear the salty tears of Berserk and Kingdom fans. It’s not a series that will explode onto the scene, but gradually builds itself up to a master-class of storytelling. I can’t even begin to fit the many layers of this tale into a short paragraph, but this first arc in Vinland Saga to me is right up there with the Golden Age Arc from Berserk and if this adaptation continues this quality, it’ll easily be a contender for Anime of the Year. Day 1,000 of the Isekai invasion. I can’t tell what is Isekai and what isn’t anymore. I think I’ve… seen this before… Is this How Not to Summon a Demon Lord? Is this Re:Zero? REM?! IS THAT YOU?! (Who’s Rem?) I can’t tell anymore! Isekai has fried my brain! All I see are the same gaming interfaces, the same medieval towns, the same edgy protagonists, I think i̷’̶m̷ g̸͚͖͓̈͒͜r̵͉͋ŏ̸̼̟͚̱̈͝w̷̢̡̺͍̻̔͒̊ĭ̸̭̪͉̍̃̐n̶̜̯̞̮͑̍́͝g̴̡̬̟̺̭̈͌̚ m̴̹̤̟̱̓̇͛͑͋͘ä̵̗͓͖̙́́̑̑̑̀͜ͅd̶͉̖̊̓͗̅͒͒!̶̤͌̆̋̀͗͘ͅ Maybe all of this summer was an Isekai Anime! Is this an Isekai?! IS THAT AN ISEKAI?! WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN?!!!! Wait a minute… I get it now. This was all a test. The Isekai gods are testing me! Vinland Saga Fire Force These aren’t Anime of the Season! How can they be when there’s no one being transported to another world? This was never about vikings or firefighters or cute girls when the ultimate evolution of Anime was right in front of our eyes. ᴹᴵᴸᶠˢᵉᵏᵃᶦᵎ MILFSᴇᴋᴀɪ! MILFSekai 𝗠𝗜𝗟𝗙𝗦𝗲𝗸𝗮𝗶! 𝙈𝙄𝙇𝙁𝙎𝙚𝙠𝙖𝙞! 𝕄𝕀𝕃𝔽𝕊𝕖𝕜𝕒𝕚! [̲̅M][̲̅I][̲̅L][̲̅F][̲̅S][̲̅e][̲̅k][̲̅a][̲̅i][̲̅!]

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