Lydia: Hey everybody. The adorbs, like I said, is back! And you know what’s totally awesome? Aside from the adorbs of course. Charlotte’s editing! Look, I’m on this side! And then… ta-da! I know, I know, I’m amazing. But let’s not get too cray cray about the magic and forget about the milestone. My name is Lydia Bennet, and this is episode sixty-nine!! [endless laughter] “Summer Friends”
Written by Rachel Kiley [wait, no, she’s still laughing] “Summer Friends”
Written by Rachel Kiley Lydia: So, there’s probably one or two of you asking yourself “Gee, where is Lizzie?” Well, my depressing older sister is spending her weekend at the library. Reason number nine as to why Lizzie Bennet is perpetually single! But don’t worry, loyal adorbites, we will still talk about Lizzie and her nerdyness. Now I know what you’re thinking. “Oh my God, Lydia! If you’re gonna be Lizzie, who’s gonna be the adorbs?!” Jane: Hey, Lydia, why can’t I be Lizzie and you be you? Lydia: ‘Cause I wanna dress up! It’s way more fun this way! Jane: Okay. Lydia: I’m going to the library. Jane: Oh, but aren’t you doing independent study? Do you really need to go to the library for that? Lydia: I’m just super nerdy, and have to live at the library with the books and the dust and the sadness because that’s what nerdy people do. Jane: You have to put up a new video tomorrow, does this mean I can do it for you? Lydia: Time out. Hey, do you think you can crank up the adorbs to like a bazillion? No offense, but you’re totes in boresville. Jane: Well, you’re a special snowflake, Lydia. No one could ever properly be you. Lydia: Open yourself up to inhabiting another person. Or letting another person inhabit you. Jane: Wow. You’re really taking this 69th video thing to heart. Lydia: Oh my god yes, that’s totes something I would say! You got it! I would rather fill my head with useless things dead people wrote than make a video and be super fun. Jane: OMG, does this mean you need someone else to do your videos for you? Cause I totes got your back, sis! Lydia: Of course you can. Your videos are always way better than mine anyway. Four syllable word, dorky literary reference, snarky comment, mother freakout! Jane: Perf! It’s gonna be supes adorbs and get you so many hits, don’t worry! ‘Cause the internet loves me and I love them, hehehe! Hahaha! Ooh! Whaaat?! Was that okay? I wasn’t trying to insinuate that you think you’re better than Lizzie or anything, I just thought with all the abbreviations– Lydia: Shut up! That was perfect! And I am supes adorbs, for realsies! Okay, but Jane, internet, we need to have a serious conversation about our… summer friends. Jane: Okay? Lydia: Darcy. Caroline. Bing. Everyone we’ve met this summer since Lizzie started her vlogs has totes filled our lives with drama and annoyance. [mouths] Ricky Collins. Jane: No, that is not true. What about Mary? You hung out with her all summer. Lydia: A, I did not just meet Mary. She’s always been our cousin, in case you forgot. And B, Mary doesn’t count because she was just with me and I am an excellent judge of character. Unlike Lizzie. I’m just saying, they probably shouldn’t be in our lives. Jane: Well, I don’t really see any of them coming back here. They’re all in new cities now and moving on to other things. Lydia: But most of them live in LA and you live in LA. And you never know when you might run into them. Jane: Sometimes, you never know. Lydia: Yuck, they all suck. I liked it so much better when it was just you, and me, and Lizzie, and Charlotte. And Mary! Mary’s cool too. Hi Mary! I hope you guys listen to me. It’s almost a new year, and that means new people, and new places, and new super fun times! No more angst and drama and stupid people who don’t matter! We work best just us. Jane: Alright. You’re right. And I hope everyone gets a happy ending. Lydia: [laughter] And that was episode 69!